Cliques are everywhere, they are unavoidable. As we grow up we float from clique to clique and we change “lunch table groups;” perhaps we were even members of a couple of different cliques at once. Our friends shape our reality and influence us beyond belief.
Even as we get older peer pressure is still extremely powerful. Have you ever noticed that no matter how old you are thugs hang out with thugs, executives hang out with other executives, and entrepreneurs hang out with entrepreneurs? The list is infinite! I wakeboard and I hang out with other wakeboarders, I’m ambitious so I surround myself with ambitious people… get it?
By surrounding myself with wakeboarders I am constantly pushed and encouraged to try new tricks, by joining a local running club I am pushed to become a better runner, and by making the effort to surround myself with entrepreneurs and others who think differently I am encouraged to take risks to follow my entrepreneurial dreams.
So take some time to think about what you aspire to be and do. Do the people you surround yourself with share these same goals and aspirations? Do they want to see you succeed? Do they push you to be come better at a mutual interest?
I’m not saying to dump your friends, I have many good friends who don’t share some of my most important interests, but think about the groups or “cliques” you belong to. What are they doing to further your career and aspirations? If nothing then make the effort to surround yourself with the people who will!
What if you want to be an entrepreneur, but all of your friends want to work their 9-5 for the rest of their lives? Go find an entrepreneur! They are in every city and small town. It doesn’t have to be the CEO of a large company, it can be the owner of the local hardware store; it doesn’t matter! Walk up to that person and explain that you want to be an entrepreneur and start asking questions, set up a weekly meeting, even ask them for a part-time job like Holly at WorkLoveLife did with a local coffee shop! These acts get your foot in the door to meet their entrepreneur friends as well as give you an understanding what it’s like to run a small business.
The internet is the most useful place to start. Search for local groups on Meetup or LinkedIn and find the group that fits your interest. For startup culture a local Dallas Entrepreneur, Alex Muse, co-founded a great blog group called SpringStage that is a coalition of bloggers who write about startups and startup life, it truly is a great resource. Use Twitter and start following those you admire; I love how I’m able to follow Guy Kawasaki and Lance Armstrong, both are people I greatly admire!
What are you waiting for!? Surround yourself with the people you want to be like and others who share your passions to ensure that you make your own dreams come true!
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6 Comments at "You Are Who You Associate With"
Great post, Daniel! And thanks for the shout out. Most people are surprised to find out that, while highly motivated, I have very poor follow-through skills. I tend to gravitate toward people who have a knack for getting things done. This way, I can see how to do in real life situations, plus I usually get the bonus of having a new friend who is encouraging and supportive in this aspect of my life.
When I decided I wanted to organize the social media community in my city, I actually drove two hours to another city to meet social community organizers there and pull them into my network. They’ve been invaluable. Next week I’m meeting with three super-talented women who run a marketing agency so I can find out more about that.
There are resources out there – you just have to jump in!
Holly, No problem! I will go ahead and admit that I have poor follow-through skills too. I have to make myself do it, write little reminders, and tell my friends and my wife to keep bugging me, so surrounding myself with people who have good follow-through skills has been key as well!
I am very glad to see this kind of article written because it has become more and more evident for me of the person we become.
Personally I struggled in debt because i associated myself with people who were in the same situation or worse.
Once i started to associate myself with people who were debt free and better off, I started to understand and on the right track.
I will post this article on twitter and facebook, great stuff.
Daniel – very solid advice. We constantly pick up the ambient noises and behaviors of our influencers (parents, co-workers, friends, leaders in some cases.) Your advice to surround yourself with like-minded people to reinforce your goals is sound. Baseball players don’t practice with football players. The other very strong thing to keep in mind is that at a time when we are very high tech in our social contact, it is more imperative that we make efforts to be high touch and have live interaction with these individuals as well. There is a unique energy you can get that can propel you forward until the next time you meet….
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[...] my fellow Gen-Y reading this, remember that you You Are Who You Associate With, and while you really don’t have much of a choice with who you surround yourself with at work [...]
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